I’ve been married almost 55 years. Your advice is right on. I have many single friends that believe getting married will make them happier because they think being single is a less happy state. But if you are unhappy before marriage and think marriage will solve that, you are apt to be disappointed.

After I’d been married about ten years I met a single gal who really wanted to be married. We became friends. At the time I was going through a difficult period in my marriage. I told her that marriage doesn’t solve all your problems — it just gives you different problems to solve. Being married isn’t necessarily better, it’s just different. A few years later she did meet the right person and they did get married. It appears they made a go of it. They moved out of the area, so I haven’t kept up with them.

I think the most important thing to ensure marriage success is commitment from both people to stick it out through the tough times. Love doesn’t instantly make differences go away. As you have said, love sticks with it and works through the problems. Then when you come closer to the end of your life, you will be glad you stuck with it. You never quite realize how important your mate is until you contemplate being alone at the end of your life when you have come to depend on each other for physical help and emotional support.

Christian, bereaved adoptive mom, blogger, amateur nature photographer, voracious reader. Married 54 years. Central Coast of California. https://barbrad.com

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